The artist inside me

I found it. I mean not only that, I found a whole new myself. I am talking about something very different here, its not usual to happen with me, I decided to go for it, I still had doubts when I was offered, as in I wasn't confident to go for it but then from somewhere inside I got the signal that yes I want to try it and I did. 

Theatre is what I am talking about, its my new interest, a very recent one. I found it last month only and quite went with the flow of it and loved thoroughly. When I heard it from a friend first that its an English Play, I was like "wow" ! Something which has been gone for quite long and I will be a part of the group who will bring it back to the city. Awesome feeling it was just with the idea.  Then I got to know I will be working with Chari Sir, again I was like "wow", indeed a great opportunity to work with him. He is a very well known director in Vadodara. I was just so happy, flying with the idea of actually being able to something different and something I would love to explore. Stage is something I always dreamt of, deep inside I always felt as if I belonged there. It was the routine where I was stuck , aah such a relief that am done with routine. I left work and this came at a very good time. Two jobs and nothing great happened, I learnt a lot though, I feel I have grown like anything. I am a different person today. 

So anyways back to Theatre talk, yes I was to perform, it was a wonderful platform that I got. And yes yes I performed at Natarani Ahmedabad. Well its a wonderful place, that feeling of being on the stage for one hour in front of the cream audience, loved it! Natarani is Ahmedabad's favorite outdoor arts venue and it offers a regular array of films, theatre, dance, exhibitions and festivals. Our play "Hidden Fires" Monologues by Manjula Padmanabhan was a part of the festival this year, many more plays by renowned artists like Nandita Das and others were a part of the same festival. I still couldn't believe that it was happening with me and that I had an artist inside me and that I could deliver. 15 days of rigorous rehearsals, forgetting, remembering and then again forgetting the lines, getting the right postures and proving myself in front of some experienced and some inexperienced actors... after all these things,  I was finally into the characters, yes I played many roles, I let my expressions and body speak more than my words even though the play was verbose. 

On our way to the venue our bus broke down, I was like oh no this can't happen with me! with us! the group! but then we found a way, finally reached. We reached our venue Mrinalini Sarabhai's Darpana Academy of Performing Arts in Ahmedabad. People also popularly know it as Natarani Cafe. 

The Stage : I had been to Natarani before but then never felt it so closely. I had been there to take an interview of the actress Shilpa Shukla from Chak De when I was interning in TOI, Ahmedabad and sometimes for coffee. But this time it was very different, when I first saw it, it was like a temple to me. I bowed down and kissed the stage. I was so high - spirited at that moment. I wasn't sure of anything, yet I was sure of one thing, of a great evening to look forward to. 

The Dressing Room: It was getting dark and we were to perform at 8 : 30 sharp. When I was in the dressing room, thoughts were running in my mind, wishes pouring in from loved ones and others, I was totally sinking in the feeling of it really happening. I was struggling with which duppatta to wear ( I was carrying 2 shades and types of white, just in case you know), asking friends if I was looking okay, if the things I had on me were good enough. The mirror was just not satisfying! hee hee!

The Make-Up : Then was the time for the make up artist to apply everything he had in the box on my delicate skin :D! I am usually scared of too much make up. He started and oh god I looked a different person then, I was so pink and looked like a doll, or like one of those great dancers with loads and loads of stuff on the face....but I knew it would look great on the stage, all the guys were looking pink too :D. 

Wow then was the time, after everyone was ready Sir got the things for the prayers. He got the incense sticks, coconut and sweets. We all did the prayers, took blessings from sir and hugged each other for the luck. Then was the time, I was in the opening scene and I was gone, I was lost in the character, just perfect for the audience I guess. I began to experience the awe when I was there in front and so many eyes were watching me. 

My stage story, my first theatre performance, my first English Play! I performed on 2nd Oct 2012. :-)

In the end I am like how many people get such opportunities and I feel so lucky to have got one.
In between the rehearsals I got malaria for 3- 4 days, with all those injections, bottles and tabs I felt I lost it and that I would never be able to get through the rehearsals and perform but no, it was for me, it was my part of happiness, I got it, I made it through with all my loved ones around me and I became fit to hit the stage. A big relief it was to get back. I realised I never wanted something so much so badly before. This made me realise that I limited my self a lot until now, now I am free, I don't hesitate, I take steps, I felt like this opportunity was certainly made for me. I am so happy with the whole experience. I bonded so well with all the group members, they were all so nice and friendly, we had an awesome time rehearsing and hanging out a bit for chai and all, I miss it too much these days, and Sir, I can't tell you much, I have no words, that man has a different way of working, he understands his actors and he gives space for creativity, am more happy because he allows people like me to debut, oh well he scolds and shouts too, for our good though :D, it is indeed a wow thing that happened with me, I wish that time comes again. We might perform again, I wish, I really really wish.